Lookout Australia. Jon Abrams is on your beautiful shores!!! The flight was long but I found some fun on board. ;) I'm quite whipped and my god parents are celebrating my arrival with a few bottles of wine so if this doensn't make any sense, tht's why. I'm a little drunk...not used to wine. I'm gonna crash and then enjoy my first full day in Sydney tomorrow. Hugs to all my friends, g'day mates, Hugs Jon

I'm packed and checking my tickets, passport and Visa papers every 5 minutes to make sure I have them. Please forgive my exuberance but I'm beside myself with excitement and a little nervousness. Thanks to all of you for all of the encouraging notes and posts. This American can't wait to come to your awesome country. I'll probably post one more time before my flight. This site makes me feel like part of me is in Sydney already. hugs Jon

I have been weeding through all of my worldly posessions in the last week trying to figure out what to take and what to sell or give to charity and then re-buy when I get to Sydney. Selling the Jeep was a no brainer. I'm actually planning on using public transporation, at least for a little while. No need to add to globla warming or dent my pocket book with car expenses, right away. My goal is to fit everything I'm going to take (except my keyboard which has already been shipped to my godparents) in my luggage. That narrows the field quite a bit. I decided that I might want to wait to buy s0me new clothes in Sydney. I know I'll need some warmer clothes. I've only lived in Southern California and Central Florida so I don't have much in the way of 'warm clothes'. I live mostly in cargo shorts and board shorts for about 9 months of the year. Also Khakis and Jeans. I have a few long sleeve shirts but not many. I'm going to need some friends to go shopping with me and help me spend some money. ;) I want to look nice for my first Australian club appearance this coming weekend. :) 12 hours and 15 minutes before my journey begins! Jon

NINE DAYS!!!!! WHOOO HOOOOO!!! This boy can't wait. The plane ride is going to seem like eternity, but I just can't wait until I get to Australia. My last night of work is this Friday and my friends are throwing me a going away party Saturday night. I can't wait. I'm not sure if Australia is ready for me, but I'm ready for Sydney. I'm a little scared, but very excited about this new chapter in my life. All of you have been awesome answering questions and getting me acquainted with all things Aussie. Hugs Jon

I never thought myself to be really superficial about the way people look. I mean, I always try to look nice, but I don't spend hours in front of the mirror. But I do know when something doesn't look good. Since school has been out I've been spending as much free time as I can going to the beach. Enjoying the water, doing some surfing, but mostly just laying out and working on my tan. (I want to be ready for the boys in Oz!) :) Yesterday must have been 300LB and over day at the beach. And most of those people had on swim suits that they shouldn't have had on. How a 60yo guy that weighs as much as my room mates and I put together can get into a speedo and think he looks sexy is beyond me. Again, I feel like I'm being so superficial writing this but it was seriously gross. Come out and enjoy the beach but put a shirt on...Please! Have a GREAT day. See you in a couple weeks!

I must say I'm impressed with the Australian Embassy and Consolute in Washington DC. It was very humbling to go there to claim my student Visa. Because of some misrouted paperwork, my passport was put in the rush file. This was good for me in that I got it a little ahead of schedule, but bad in that I had to claim in in person rather than by registered mail. But this was a great experiance. The people were very polite. I was also given instructions and forms for applying for citizenship instead of renewing my 2 year Student Visa when it comes time to renew. I didn't realize that the Embassy is considered on Australian ground and not US soil. (I had time to read lots of literature while I waited for my appointment.) I read all about the history of your great country and enjoyed being immursed in Australian culture for a couple hours. This American can't wait to land on your shores! hugs, Jon

So what does it mean to be 'out'? Does this mean we wear rainbow pins and have a rainbow flag hanging by the door of our flat? Does it mean we put "Out and Proud" bumper stickers on our cars? Do we have to be out to everyone we know? If someone asks us the time, do we tell them and say, oh by the way, this time check was brought to you by a homosexual? I'm out to my room mates and close friends. And I'm also out at one of jobs, but not the other one. And no one I was in class with, this year knew I was gay, that is unless I showed up on their 'gaydar'. The reason I'm not out at one of my jobs is that the owner is very conservative and doesn't have a lot of tolerance for anyone who doesn't fit his idea of what 'normal' is. He doesn't like people with lots of tattoos or piercings. He's one of the most closed minded people I've ever met. But, I need the job, or do at least until I leave for Australia, so I've kept quiet. So is that right? Should I feel guilty for not coming out to him? Does this do damage to not furthering the 'gay cause'? Am I not being honest with myself or does it matter? My point is that, I don't think everyone needs to know everything about me. I mean even though my friends know I'm gay, they don't know what position I like in bed or whether I prefer to be a bottom or a top. (I'm not revealing that here either. Ask me if you want to know, I might tell you.) ;-) I guess I don't see the point in telling everyone, everything. I mean, does it change who I am? I like to think that everything I am is not summed up by my sexuality. I think being gay just means that I like guys and would rather a guy in my bed. I'm Out, but I don't have a neon sign over my head telling everyone.

I was up late Wednesday night. I was getting pleasantly drunk celebrating the end of exams and school. And I thought, Hey..I have to learn Australia's National Anthem. So thanks to the internet, I got a copy of the lyrics and then a few clicks later courtesy of YouTube had several videos of people singing it. And amazingly enough the anthem is about Advancing Australia Fair. While our dumb anthem is about the flag still waving after a big battle in the war of 1812, nothing about the US as a country. So I looked up Canada's N.A. and yep, it's about Canada. So why isn't our National Anthem 'America the Beautiful' or something like that? We have a lame NA. I mean the music is beautiful, but the words..."Oh Say does that Star Spangled Banner still wave?" Come at least talk about the "mountain majesties and the fruited plain". Ok enough of my rant. And just for the rec0rd, I like the Australian National Anthem. I have the music and have played it several times in the couple of days. i'm sure my roomies appreciate the fact that I have headphones on my keyboard. :) Jon

LONDON (Reuters) -- BP Plc said Tuesday that CEO John Browne resigned after British courts lifted an injunction preventing a newspaper group from publishing details about his private life. "In my 41 years with BP I have kept my private life separate from my business life," Browne said in the statement. "I have always regarded my sexuality as a personal matter, to be kept private. It is a matter of deep disappointment that a newspaper group has now decided that allegations about my personal life should be made public," he added. _____ I guess Browne tried to defame his ex-lover by suggesting he was an alcoholic and drug abuser, and lied about his relationship to him to the high court in London. But it seems it's becoming a 'dirty thing' to be found out you are gay. I mean, the guy wasn't married, he didn't cheat on his wife and family. So why can't the head of Britain's largest company be gay? It seems that the media thinks that success whether in the entertainment field, politics or business and being homosexual are mutually exclusive. 20 years ago to find a political, entertainment persona, or business leader cheating on his wife was big news. Now that's expected. The big news now is finding that they are gay and leading a double life. So, why did they lead a double life? No one is asking that question, only that they did it. Coming out is risky no matter who you are. And if you are on some kind of public 'radar screen' it's even riskier. This has to change.

Today has been a good day. I think I did well on my biochemistry lab and I learned some things about myself. First of all, I owe 'Weasel' an apology. I slammed him for his critique of Anthony Callea's coming out. Then I realized I was doing the same thing to 'Weasel' that I accused him of . Shoddy of me, I know. Then secondly I read something someone wrote in their blog about seeking a great relationship with someone and realizing that one must first have a great relationship with themselves before expecting one with someone else. That was deep and I thought very true. So I'm taking their advice and looking in the mirror to make sure I've got my shit together before I go looking at someone else and also to not dish out what I accuse someone else of doing. So it's been a good day. I wrote a good exam (I think) and I learned a lot about myself. Now if I could just get my roomie to bring home another bottle of tequila......... :)

Ok, no deep philosophical posts today. Just a post on the sheer enjoyment of stepping off of the treadmill and taking a break. For the last few weeks I've been preparing for exams which are next week, working to keep a roof over my head and food in my mouth and working with the US and Australian governments to get desire to come to Australia to study and live. So today when my roomy came home with a big bottle of tequila I got a wide smile and quickly made up some lemonade poured myself a big glass of it with a few shots of tequila mixed in for good measure. I'm now basking in the glow of a nice tequila based buzz and realizing that studying for my exams can wait. Stress is over rated. The world needs more room mates bringing home large bottles of alcohol. Cheers!!!!

I had an email from one of the many friends I have met on this site and he explained a little about ANZAC day. I then spent about an hour and a half reading about the ultimate sacrifice Australians and New Zealands made in the first world war. It brought tears to my eyes. I know I'm an American, but this American had a moment of silence this morning of April 25th to honor the memory of those that have fallen to protect Australia and New Zealand. Thanks to all who have served to protect the freedom, life and country we love.

So are there talents you have that you keep to yourself? I have one. Not many of my friends know that I play the piano and keyboards, (also a little guitar). It's not that I hide it on purpose, but it's just something I do for me. I also love to write music. Nothing very good. I've never had any music published or even played or sung by anyone but me, but it's something that I do to vent. I actually had one of my friends from work lecture me about keeping my talent hidden after we went shopping one Friday night recently. We were at a mall and I just stopped by a keyboard in one of stores we were in and started playing. She just stood there with her mouth open. She said why didn't you tell me you could play? It's almost exactly the same question she asked when I finally told her I was gay. Only 'could play' was put in the place of 'were gay'. And my answer was almost the same. But instead of 'Well you aren't a single guy', I said 'Well you aren't a piano' so what's the point? Then came the lecture...."you shouldn't keep stuff like that to yourself". Why not? It's for me. If I start playing in public, then it's no longer 'for me'. Then I'll have to find something else that's my retreat and my vent. Does that make any sense? Somethings I just like keeping to myself or at least to my closest friends. So do you have any hidden talents or things you just like to keep to yourself and your most intimate friends and family? Or am I a little off the mark about this one? Jon

So what is that supposed to mean? Does it mean that whatever is 'so gay' is attracted to other things 'so gay' of the same sex? Does it mean the 'so gay' thing goes out and dances its a$$ off at gay clubs? When someone says that's 'so blonde' I have an idea of what that means. It's demeaning to blondes but nonetheless we know that it means it's probably a little bit dumb. But I don't get what it means when something is 'so gay'. Gay to me means I like guys. Which I do. Actually, I LOVE guys. I like gay sex, I like looking at guys and I like flirting with guys. To me, that's what it means to be gay. I have no idea why a girl last night referred to a piece of lemon pound cake as 'so gay'. Maybe she knows something about pound cake that I don't. Anyway I had one of them on my break, just in case it harboured special gay powers. :) Then just before closing ( I work at Starbucks part time) another girl was reading a magazine article her friend had shown her and her response after reading it was, 'That's so gay!". Well I was going to ask her if I could read it, but they left. So I guess I'll never know what makes inanimate objects and events 'so gay'. I'm open to enlightenment from anyone, after all, I'm only 19 and have only been out less than a year and have only been with a couple guys, so obviously I have a lot to learn about gay culture. :) OMG, what if this blog is 'So Gay' and I don't even know it! :) Jon

Just in case you didn't hear, AnthonyCallea is touring New South Wales, Victoria, and Queensland in July and August. I've already got tickets for Sunday, August 10th at Canterbury Hurlstone Park. Whoo Hoooo! Check it out! http://www.anthonycallea.com.au/newsEvents/home.do?newsId=20030829004454